coming. up. for. air.

i am trying to come up for air.

i really am.

i just feel like i am still sinking. that's all.

have you ever felt like you are doing too much?

and because you are doing so much, you can't do anything right?

i don't know if i mean right.

i mean you are just getting by.

nothing you do is great.

it's just okay...because you have so much to do,

it all can't get your "best".

part of that is life, i know.

but the other part is me.

and the other part of that is my perfectionistic side...i know that too.

i feel like because i am a stay at home mom that people think i don't do anything. {don't get too alarmed, i know this isn't totally true...

it's just how i feel sometimes...} 

that i have all the time in the world.

and part of that is true. i do have a lot more time~to start with~

than say a mom who works outside of the home.

so...because of this, people just keep asking me to do things.

and. i do it. all.

and now...i feel like i am running as hard as all the moms who work full time outside of the home.

i mean it.

i really am spinning circles here.

the sad and honest thing about it is...it's no one's fault but my own.

bummer.

for me.

i am once again trying to sort out the difference in me being

"called" to do something, versus "wanting" too, versus "needing" too.

and i love to serve.

i *really* love to serve.

part of my calling as a woman of God...is serving.

i know that.

but then why am i getting so tired?

it's so hard for me to know where to draw the line.

and how do you say no anyway?

all that to say...

Good News Club is coming to Octorara Primary Learning Center.

YEEEE.HAAAA.

i am very, very excited.

this has been on my heart for a very long time, and it's finally coming to fruition.

and that feels good. really, really good.

we feel called to the public school system.

we do.

that's all.

and we want to make a difference.

we want people to know us.

to know our kids.

to see Jesus in us. thru us. on us.

we all mess up.

i do. matt does. our kids do.

and i expect we are going to continue to really mess up.

like in really B*I*G ways...

that's okay.

who doesn't anyway?

our first club is monday...the 25th...

from 3:30 pm until 5 pm.

you can pray for me, and all my helpers.

for the kids who will come.

for a fun. fun. time.

~i am completely weeded from a bunch of training that being involved

with this club means. pray that this club would be a fun get-away

for kids who need one. that they could see Jesus here. that God

will work in a mighty way in the hearts and minds of our kids...

that i wouldn't be stressed about the club looking or running

a certain way...~

i am off to work on my Beth Moore bible study.

because. i. am. behind. i mean WAY behind.

oops.

thanks for listening. and maybe even relating.

cheers.

and p.s.   KNOW that i am passionate about the things that i do.
i think they are all important.
YOU are all important.
my life is fun.
most of the time. :)
i just need some help delineating...is that spelled right?
what i should be doing,
and what i should LET someone else do...
ha.ha.ha.